2017 May 15

She is here.

Ophelia Grace Winchell was born on a cold and icy morning in February. She is the most beautiful thing. She is magic.

I went into labor at 10:00 PM on February 7th and she was born at 2:47 AM on February 8th. I didn’t even know I was in labor at first. Just a steady cramp that woke me up that night. I called the doctor. I took a bath. I sat on the toilet a hundred times. The pain was not going away.

“Come in,” the hospital said. “We’ll hook you up to the monitors and check you out.”

And so we went and in my mind I thought we would come home.

But my cramps were getting worse the closer we got. I wasn’t even calling them contractions. I am not having this baby tonight, I thought. I can’t!

But I did!

When I arrived at the hospital I was in so much pain. I had to sit down and IT HURT. My stomach would contract and the intensity was crazy. They put me in a wheel chair and I just felt like I had to push. “Don’t push!!” they said, “We don’t know if you’re ready. You could hurt yourself if you’re not ready.”

BUT I WAS READY.

I changed into the hospital gown, went to the bathroom again and my water broke. I kept feeling like I had to push and they kept telling me DO NOT PUSH.

Then the nurse checked me… “YOU ARE 10 CENTIMETERS.”

WHAAAAAT (Zan says I yelled.)

And then they hooked me up to the monitors and I started to push. No time for medicine. No time for fear.

I pushed and I pushed and I pushed. “Look at me, Anna,” Zan said. “You can do this. Look at me.”

I pushed for 45 minutes and remember it like it was yesterday. It was hard, but it did not hurt. It felt crazy, but it felt right. I felt her head coming down and I felt her slip into this world. And I loved it. I loved every minute of it.

They put her on my chest and there she was, our baby.

“I can’t believe she’s here. I can’t believe she’s here. I am so SO happy she is here.”